Sam & Roxie's kilts are 8 yards and 5 yards, fully pleated in back. John and mine are quickly done, costume only, not even the right tartan, but close. Roxie's is not quite Davidson clan, but she loves green and blue and it was in my fabric stash, conveniently.
I decorated our car trunk with silk flowers hung #56 tags, and the red satiny quilt (from Luanna) and the 56 days left sign: Christmas countdown. We won one of the trunk decorating prizes! Scariest?
People, friends, have asked me this week how I am doing, really doing, and they made time to listen. I
have gotten teary-eyed and mushy and choked up and realized how much I am still
grieving for Maxwell's loss. I miss him,
and still feel really sad. It makes
sense to me now the year of mourning in Victorian times, family wearing black,
or at least black armbands in remembrance of their lost one.
It has been easy
to escape reading books and not having to "think" or "feel"
or to stay busy, really busy, or get involved in serving someone else so I
don't think about being sad.
One listening friend said, "I don't know how you are doing it, even waking up and getting out of bed."
Holidays are sad, since we use them as gathering, food celebrating, and remembering. Max was a blue-body suit man last year. He asked me to mend his suit where it had ripped a little at the neck. I fixed it but didn't get it back to him, he said he didn't need it until Halloween. Every time I see Suzu in her matching suit, I think it would have been a fun picture/video of them together. Regret un-photos=times you wish you had photographed, but too late.
Dealing with stress and grief--besides drinking
more water, getting outside once a day, not eating sugar, reading scriptures on
my own, doing something unexpected and nice for someone else at least once a week, and everyday being nice to
myself (hot shower) and giving myself a complement--saying something out
loud while looking in the mirror. Something about me that I like and is real and true (not just something I do well, but an attribute describing who I
am, inside. Kind of like the pep-talk in
"The Help" that the maid gives her boss's daughter "You is kind,
you is smart, you is important").
And yes, our garage now has burnt orange diamonds, for Halloween.
Because I am a visionary woman. I like to see changing colors in my environment. The autumn trees are gorgeous and inspiring and I like to savor colors like flavors for my eyes. (Haha, now I am laughing at myself.)
