Light The World Honoring the Sabbath

My mom is the best example.  For the last 18 days she has consequently blogged of her experiences following the #lighttheworld project as seen here https://www.mormon.org/?cid=HP_FR_25-11-2016_dMIS_fmorg_xLIDyL1-A_ 

I haven't been reading her blog every day, so I had to play catch-up, this Sabbath morning. 

John leaves for a church meeting at 6 am, so we are awake early.  After he leaves I spend the time emailing my weekly letter to our missionary son, and briefly see what my long-distance family is doing.  We aren't in the habit of phone calls (we have an awesome brother-in-law who chats daily with his parents & siblings. DAILY!  I admire that), or visiting as often as I wish. 

Geography is a challenge if face-to-face communication is your love language preference.  Skpye is ok, but feels like an appointment, a little stiff.  Maybe it is the hugging I miss with the contact.  I crave the physical reassurance and communication of love through touch. 

A once-a-week check in with our spiritual selves, an assessment of our spiritual well-being and health makes sense.  I believe the Old Testament teaching that the Lord made it a holy day.  He sanctified it.  Our "keeping the sabbath day holy" is up to us, how we interpret that.  It will still be a holy day, with or without us.  The old Blue Laws that enforced store closures and alcohol sales on Sunday am have slowly been dismissed.  It has turned into a big shopping day, chore day, networking day, and even a work day for many.  And I will say right here, I am thankful for the emergency workers, doctors, nurses, police and firemen and their sacrifice to work all week.)

I have a memory of attempting to persuade my dad that my doing the dishes was breaking the Sabbath.  He pointed me back to "Honor they father and thy mother..." and there may have been some ox in the mud references.  I did the dishes.

Over the years I have tried different things, including no sewing, no painting, no school homework, no fun novel reading (just scriptures), no tv, newspapers, no facebook, no friends, no restaurants, and probably too long of indulgent napping.  The exceptions have been specific, for example, watching the First Presidency Christmas Devotional live the first Sunday of December ever year, or supporting family reunion restaurant gathering for non-member family (I would do anything for Great Grandma Billie).

It has been more productive to think of the yes-we-can-do instead of the no-don't-even-think-about-it restrictions for the day.

Do go to a worship service of choice.
Do spend time with family and learning about ancestors.
Do support good friends in achievements.
Do celebrate holidays!
Do community service.
Do rest from the craziness of all the other day responsibilities and burdens.
Do find time to pray and ponder life.
Do spend time remembering and renewing commitments and promises.
Do simplify and lessen the burdens of others. (Sometimes that means paper plates and less elaborate meals!)

I like to think of the Sabbath as a day to get back in touch with what God wants me to do.  I try to plan what my priorities should be for the week, to seek counsel on troubles and concerns, to brainstorm for solutions.  It is a good day to ask Heavenly Father for help.  Loving the Sabbath leaves me with a feeling of love, peace, joy, gratitude, and kind, swelling and warm feelings.  And that touch of grace makes my week flow better.

Work makes us strong!

Not much creative blogging lately...busy working in the office, with numbers and cost basis...

(photo credit:  Sister-by-marriage Jen)
I think we may need to start being more consistently photographed together, on purpose!  She caught us smiling and legs entwined!  Look how skinny-good Johnny looks!    We are trying to be healthier (this time changing what we are eating, not just walking together), working now so we can be in shape for a mission in...20 years!  It will be that long before we can retire. 

I've been working 40 hour weeks for the past few months as an on-call fill-in, but turned down two of the full-time offers after praying hard about it.  I feel I need to stay flexible to be able to help my children, be here after school when they come home, concentrate on making our home a house of order, and living within our means and being thrifty.  The answer to my prayers was pretty specific, how I need to be satisfied with what we have, not over-extend my dreams and wishful-remodeling hopes, but make the best of what we have been blessed with NOW and trust that things will work out. 

In 5 years when Roxie graduates from high school, things may change again, and given the same offer in the future I may take it eagerly.  But not yet.  I will trust that timing matters.  Plus, a huge part of working full-time would leave me zero time to paint for clients, or be creative at home.  It has been hard, really hard, and my heart reaches out to moms who already really have to work all day/night outside the home.

My boss says if you want to be rich do 5 things: 
1.  buy a home you can afford and pay it off and live there
2.  get married and stay married 
3.  find a job with upward mobility and keep working 
4. clean living (healthier, less dr bills plus not paying for vices $$$)
5.  invest and spend less than you make. 

Easy, right?

I finally opened an account, a ROTH IRA and bought my first stock.  Just one share.  Our income is pretty tied up in bills and children and student loans...not much wiggle room to invest.  Very exciting to be on the client side.  I should have done it a long time ago to see what it is like and to be able to explain things better to clients.

Work to stay married, work to be healthy, work to pay bills, work to support families, work to create art---still something I feel I need to do.  I could see it clearly:  if at the end of my life I had made lots of $ and we had gotten out of debt faster & fixed the house up sooner & travelled OR if at the end of my life I knew my children, had been available time-wise/face-time and had painted what I still need to paint and had the time for service and making a home---easy choice.

So my re-commitment is to be a homemaker, stay-at-home mom/wife/friend in 2014.  I still have a few commitments for work on the calendar through December, but tapering off.  Keeping my on-call status in good standing with 100 hours a year, but only every-other-week 6 hours during school time.

New Tradition to Document Our Progress

We finished! Not before the end of the year, but it was close. I like how this one of the children turned out:

Max is gone on a Maryland State Boychoir tour for the weekend, and then moving out to live with an aunt & uncle who live 2 blocks away. He is signed up for classes at the local community college. We are extending a standing invitation to him to come home and eat dinner with us every night.

Roxie prayed tonight that Elder Landbeck and Sister & Elder Babcock would be "continually happy" as they work hard as missionaries. And for Emmalyn's headaches to improve, and for Max to come back to Church.

How Are You Doing, Really?

From a limited perspective you could say things are going great. The wobbly van that we worried was a broken axle (?) was only a worn out tire, cheaper fix than we dreaded. John is working every day, sometimes until really, really late, but he is getting the Census interviews completed and he is paid for all those miles! I finished visiting teaching for the month, and went shopping for a spring sunshine scarf for one of my sisters I visit and found it. Emma's headache pain is down. Stewart's dental appointment is Friday for the last thing before he puts in his mission papers (yeah!). Max told us he is going to BYU (YEAH!) for the year before his mission. Suzu comes home tomorrow (she is a counselor at a school camp this week entertaining 5th graders in the wilderness). Sam's lower braces don't hurt as bad as last week, and he is getting his math homework every day. Roxie finished reading all the Black Eye Susan collection of books in the media center and is winning her preferred computer game!

The reality is many un-finished projects. Decisions to make. De-cluttering, cleaning, and organizing. Clients to take care of with a long waiting list. Financial struggles, still. Commitments that sometimes seem overwhelming. Intense parenting discussions. Struggles and obstacles galore. Stuff we all deal with.

We are not bored.

We drag ourselves out of bed before 5 am, pray together. Start our day right.

I was impressed teaching seminary on Tuesday as we talked about the simple little thing of praying in the morning. It increases the light you receive. And changes your whole day. I've been lazy about counting our "couple prayer" as my morning prayer. But for the last two days I have been waking up before the alarm, and praying on my own before John stirs awake.

Does it matter? YES!

It's a great way to start the day. It gets me through the hard sticky stuff. Makes everything shiny.

On Purpose

There are things I do different on purpose. Ways I try very hard not to appear ordinary.

I asked Sister Babcock on her mission what I could pass on to the pre-missionary youth. She talked about the ability to open up and talk to complete strangers, learning to share your feelings and thoughts about religious and spiritual things, and then she stressed, "Complete obedience in all things."

She told me that they were very impressed with a young missionary who had to go to the doctor with his companion. There was a tv in the waiting room, outside of their control, but this obedient elder purposefully turned his head away and would not watch.

It is okay to stand out in beliefs and moral conviction!

The trick is doing it consistently. Believing it and living it needs FAITH so you act on it and avoid being a hypocrite.

I *cringe inside when I tell the seminary kids they are in charge of their bodies. They don't have to just go along with what is happening to them. They can exert force, choose to get out of uncomfortable and wrong circumstances.

They can STOP breaking the Word of Wisdom, they can STOP kissing before the intensity of passions and feelings and hormones take over; they can stop touching inappropriately.

They can STOP looking at immodest people. They can turn away.

They CAN WAIT until they get married to have sex. They CAN WAIT to experience those pleasures.

They CAN CONTROL their thoughts by singing their favorite hymn. They CAN CONTROL their appetites and desires by exerting faith and acting on the Sunday School Answers that outline what the GOSPEL is all about:

1. be strong, read the scriptures so they will know and can obey the commandments, (FAITH in the LORD JESUS CHRIST)
2. pray every day at least twice, (REPENTANCE)
3. go to Church, keep coming to seminary, (BAPTISM and renewal of that covenant each Sabbath through the Sacrament).
4. do everything in their power to step away from and avoid temptations (listen to the GIFT OF THE HOLY GHOST)
5. and then do it every day (ENDURE TO THE END!)

Even though I am not a perfect example of exerting body control (don't say chocolate, ice cream, donuts, or anything about my eating when I am stressed and not exercising enough) the principle is still true*.

I can control my physical body with my spiritual choices. I believe that.

Now I just need to do it on purpose.

Everyday Prayers

Sometimes I wonder what we look like, our hands entwined, our heads bent, praying. This is a little peek. Maybe it is like this. (Note: I did not take a picture of us praying. This was a coincidence of hitting the button when we were both blinking.)

I am glad I married a praying man. He is good at remembering to pray, even when I am really tired and already half asleep.

We are still praying for help in figuring out job situation. It is easy to point at a wish list and want to just hand it in, like a Christmas wish-list.

"I've been good, so give me this, please."

John encourages me to learn how to say, "Thy will be done" prayers, instead.

They are still specific prayers, but maybe they could be more humble, accepting.