Challenge: Create YOUR Own Couple Collection!

I am so glad we did this crazy blog-a-couple-photo-thon. There are almost 500 pictures in our couple folder now. Not all of them are stunning. Some are super-duds, both of our eyes crossed, not on purpose, extra neck folds looking unflattering...Just from the number of photos we took and the consistency, statistically we were bound to have some winners! (my face in this one-I like my hair here and chin looks better, but you can't see John well)
(and THIS ONE of John! Adorable! Can't keep my hands off of him!)
(same photo as last one, just cropped differently. I have learned a lot this year about picture presentation.)

Most common problem: one of us will look great in one photo, and the other will look more natural/real in another one. Must learn how to merge images. Cut and paste?

If you have liked seeing us every day, I challenge you, TODAY, or over the holidays, to start taking a couple photo every day. Even if you have crazy opposite hours. Even if your hair isn't perfect and you are make-up-less. Get close to your significant other and take more pictures! Just for fun. It can be a before-the-year-ends resolution! Don't wait for January! Do it today! Every day of December! And tell me what you learn from doing it.
(Suzu photographer, Nov 15th)

Happy Birthday to Mom-Mine!

Thanks, Mom, for birthing me. I am thankful for YOUR birthday today. Thankful to be here in SLC celebrating in person. Thank you for helping me grow up and want to be a mommy, like you.
(picture taken 2 weeks ago, Sunday 15th at sunrise, before John's EQ mtg)

Profound thoughts at seminary training meeting. We watched Sister Julie Beck's talk to the Church Education System leaders. She encouraged us to focus on the family in our teaching, no matter what scripture year, and to use "The Family: A Proclamation to the World" more in our classrooms. Help our students leave feeling like Jacob and Rebekkah. Encourage them to get to the temple. Help them see their potential as an eternal family. Anything Anti-Christ is anti-family. If something is anti-family, then it is anti-Christ.

And when I asked John to do something that was good for our marriage, he agreed, and said, "This is good for our family."

I am glad he gets it.

Black and White, continued

(photo taken Saturday 14th @ spaghetti dinner. Love what happens when color is taken out, if there is enough contrast, and if not, I can bump up the shadows.)

Black and White or Sepia

(front porch from 2+ weeks ago. We take more than one photo each session, and this is a great way to show you some of my favorites!)

I am not shopping on Black Friday. Painting in color!

But I love what happens to photos with color taken out. Shapes matter more. Connections.

Good to be connected by technology, if not geographically.

Thankful, Heart Full

(almost black and white. This is my #3 favorite photo of early November. I think it is our expressions that I love.)

Fogging Up Car Windows

(pictures taken outside of health club, rainy day. It didn't take long for the windows to fog up as we tried to get our faces just right in the mirror!) (less color. My #2 favorite this week's worth of couple photos!)

(more color. My #1 favorite this week!)

My college roommate, Ellen, had a truck. She was WAY more generous than she should have been (did I ever pay for gas?).

After a date with John, we were TALKING and eating KFC in the parking lot in front of his dorm, and we got a "Tap, TAP" on the glass. Campus police, making sure our clothes were on. Embarrassing. But it made us laugh. I think John offered the officer a piece of chicken.

Pre-Fog

Some times things seem so clear. Easy to understand. Simple. Perfect.

This man helps me be me, clearly, without confusion. The best me. The good me, not the grouchy mommy-me. He makes her disappear with kind words and gentle touches.

Am I tamed? Beau and the Beastette? I could re-write some fairy-tales.
(This picture was taken JUST BEFORE the one in tomorrow's post! We are in the car, after working out on elliptical machines together--Emma taught me how, I taught John. Pass on the knowledge!)

Laughter and Good-bye Tears?

This morning I am leaving on a jet plane. I do know when I will be back: I have 12 days to paint a mural plus base coating for my parents. I have up-loaded stockpiled photos of us from the last weeks, so we will be united in blogdom but 2000+ miles away. Out of sync photo history, so technically it won't be couple photos in a continuous number of days. Maybe by the time I get back Johnny will have new employment and we can go down to once a week portraits!

John came into the room when I was tweaking this photo. "I'm glowing!" I had just used the "glow" button, and centered the glow on his shirt. Yes, it is well-named. Okay, that isn't that funny in writing. John is a better joke-teller.

What do you think about when you are trying to smile for the camera? A joke? Do you say something silly? John knows my tickle places. More often it is something he says, just right before he clicks the button, that makes me laugh out loud. Some of my favorite pictures are when he is using the timer, and trying to make it back next to me before it goes off. No, I am not blogging all the back-side photos I have, but I am nearly doubled in half laughing!

Nice Teeth!

(Roxie photographer, Sat pm before stake activity)
We left before the dancing ever started. 8:30 pm I was exhausted, felt my social skills dwindling rapidly. We made a smooth exit during the applause for one of the program numbers (and felt bad that we missed Peter Paul and Mary).

BEST. CUPCAKES. EVER. Peach Pit's mom made spice cake + pumpkin with oj frosting=perfect! She says no oil, no eggs, just 2 ingredients. Usually I lick off the frosting and give the cupcake to John. But I ate the whole thing of this one!

Favorite part of "New Moon" was an oil painting coming to life, the shadows and highlights on the faces merging into real life moving film. Nice touch.

Second was the cliff jumping shot, camera following the jumper up and following his dive up and arching into the water below. The spiralling camera stuff back to back would have been more effective with some additional editing (I'm volunteering for the job). Better than the first film, but too many yawn moments and weird awful pausing. Staring is not acting. A good book to film adaptation needs Peter Jackson. More visual storytelling. Tighter editing. And more. Not just scenes, unless they are montaged and given to the audience faster. Much faster.

Third, was Bella's green dress and Alice's red leather gloves.

Fourth, Victoria's cool vampire moves.

But this is not a recommendation. I'll wait for all the films to be made and watch them with a fast forward button.

It was fun being out with popcorn sharing friends. Waving down the row to familiar faces! That part was fun! I learned that KatieW is super loyal, stayed with me to watch the end credits (I have to see who the gaffer is and where it was really filmed).

But my favorite date is still John. I am thankful to start and end my days with him, my best friend.

Pre-Blogging for Future Viewing Pleasure

I have been using the "post options" click to make an entry for future days. Sometimes it makes my days sound stranger than they really were.

This one is for Saturday, even though I am writing Friday morning with a picture we took at 7 pm Thursday night.

(Saturday) is one of my seminary student's Eagle Project 8 am, then I'm making rolls for the stake adult dance/dinner tonight, and early afternoon I am seeing New Moon with some Church buddies. You see how it is easier to write this the day before?

So I am giving you inaccurate timeline pictures for the next 2 weeks, things we have already done pictorially, with thoughts from now. If I can figure out how to easily blog from my parents I may add comments that are up-to-date.

It has been a challenge to be creative and make the pictures meaningful to us. Some of my favorites are coming up! Can't wait for you to see them!
(original photo, taken by John)

Sunny Days and Bright/Right Colors

The worse thing about glasses that automatically tint in sunlight: they do no good driving in sunshine. Behind the car windows, they don't turn dark enough to be any good. 2nd worse thing: take a long time to un-tint going from outside to inside. Maybe it is old technology. These are my favorite glasses, going on 5 years old...I lost them for a month (painting day upheaval makes dangerous piles) and I am happy to have them back! I wouldn't get tinting-changing ones again.

Packing for my mural-job-trip, babysitting Peach Pit today, and color-matching a quilt to paint colors for a job when I come back from SCL trip. It is much easier to buy the fabric collection first. Choose and order the bedding and THEN pick paint colors. Don't do it the other way around. And check them in the lighting where they will be, with the rug and any other variables in place. Better to be safe, than paint it over and over trying to get it right. Like I have done.

A Picture of Us Without Being a "Picture" of Us

Our days of togetherness include walking Roxie to school, picking her up. We don't always walk. Sometimes one or the other of us will take the car.

It is magical when we do walk. More time to talk, hold hands, see things. I had a rock in my shoe, and my Prince Charming did a Cinderella for me.

Read the Fine Print

What do I really wish I had known about marriage/motherhood before I committed myself to this life?

I thought I would probably be a good mom, because I liked babies, liked doing creative things with kids. From being the oldest of 9 children I had lots of experience with managing groups, the feeding and cleaning necessary. I was confident. Too cocky, surely.

I really liked the Guy-Future-Father-of-My-Children--couldn't think of living without him or him with anyone else but me!

I didn't anticipate having to do things when I am tired and hungry and stressed, all at once. Function under fire, with a smile. Boot camp for motherhood would include sleep-deprivation and multi-tasking while being interrogated and assaulted with horrible smells and sensations. And de-sensitizing of irritants. Pick the top ten things that bug you and figure out how to ignore/put-off/dismiss them.

stealthily sticky kitchen counters (you don't notice until you put a paper down on them to sign and than you can't pull it up without ripping the paper)
food on the floor and candy wrappers (evidence!) in a non-eating room
dirty socks on top of couch pillows awry
spit on the bathroom mirror & muddy shoes on just cleaned carpet
toe nail clippings in disturbing places (kitchen counter!) or hairs in the butter
loud noises when trying to sleep
encroaching on your territorial borders & collapsing of any personal space bubble
non-stop questioning and endlessly repeated instructions that are ignored
over-flowing garbage cans that smell really bad
multiple needs from multiple people with multiple expectations...

I wish I had taken more naps earlier in life to make up for sleep-less life now. I'm not walking the hallway calming a colicky baby these days, just waking up early to teach them and trying to go to be in bed early enough with teenager's crazy schedules.
Can you read the recipes on the yellow sticky notes? Details matter, add up. Small things can move mountains, or make mountains. Constant, daily efforts determine character. I am my choices. 70 shrinking extra pounds of ice cream and chocolate choices balanced with 1/2 hour of exercise almost every week day. (How many snickers is that?) Today, I choose to exercise early, be productive, study more, be nicer. Too many grouchy-mommy moments yesterday, and I stopped swimming after 20 minutes of laps. I can be better today than I was yesterday, by choice.

Meteor Shower Morning

We invited seminary students to come at 4 am and join us in the soccer field next door to watch the meteor shower! I was pleasantly surprised at how many came-12 students 2 hours early?! We saw at least one big good one that was long enough that everyone ooohhed and ahhhed and asked for an encore. Earlier, at 3:30 am, John and I saw a spectacular orange one! Most of what we saw was a streak of white light, like a falling star. Donuts, hot chocolate, and during class olives (we are on Jacob 5) and cheese and crackers.

(photo by Sam, taken in stairwell)

Looking at this photo makes me want to paint the mirror frame pink, like my earrings. Taking a photo and looking at it objectively helps me see things with a new eye.

I want my mom to take photos of every room she wants me to paint, the way it looks right now. Send me copies, or blog post them (I dare you?) so we can create true "BEFORE" and "AFTER" pictures. But do it before changing anything or any more prep. I'll even be fair and give you a big messy one of mine:
Before Emma comes home for Christmas break, this will turn back into a bedroom for her...When I am non-emotional about this room and look at it critically, I can see that I need to organize my shelves, open up the entryway, get things off of horizontal surfaces, lose the many inspiration piles, find a better way to declutter...Right now this isn't a bedroom, it is a half-way house for indecision. De-cluttering means deciding, committing.

Artificial Effects?

(photo by Suzu)
"Film Grain" button makes the photo look old. Contrived? A little. But I like the effect today. Kind of like crackling paint on purpose, or stressing new furniture to look antiqued, or dying your hair to look younger? Harmless way to experiment, even if it is pretend.

Today makes 7 weeks of non-employment. We are doing okay with lots of help from family and friends. Surviving. Still eating fine. Same prayers.

In 20 years this will be a memory of something we survived together. Side by side. Stronger because of the trial. And we will be thankful for it.

With a Little Help

...from our friends. Last night, spaghetti dinner fundraiser for the Scouts.
Permission to play!

The silent auction did well. I gave a t-shirt make-over: turn a guy's t-shirt into a feminine, modest, and flattering version.

Thankul for the Encouragement!

Look at the amazing art work in the Havre de Grace United Methodist church! Symmetrical holy leaves painted up both sides of the organ pipes. Max sang last night with MSB. (same living room couch as yesterday, daylight coming in. Suzu photographer. It looks like I did a poor job photo-shopping John into this picture--but I think it is the weird reflection of the glass juxtaposed against his silver hair? Cross stitch by church friend LauraJ.) Thank you for all the great comments yesterday! The support is noted and appreciated. So, I am not changing this blog's name, and continuing...couple photos! It amazes me how we influence one another in blog-dom. I want to be edifying, uplifting, up-beat, encouraging to others. And honest and real. In seminary Friday we talked about Jacob 2. Pride. Enmity. For an object lesson I dressed up in sequins, pearls, all the rings I could find, glitter cheeks, dramatic lipstick. Challenged them to be careful of judging others by their riches or clothing, and work at being humble on their own, and not wait to be compelled to be humble. Be teachable. Be good.

Too Much of Us?

I don't really know who reads this blog unless you post a comment. Are you getting tired of seeing us everyday? Smiling, happy, in love...still looking for work. John applied today for one that sounds promising. I feel like I say that every day. Lots of long romantic lunch dates that end at 2 pm when the high school kids come home. Cross country is over and wrestling hasn't started yet.
Serious faces (sitting in front of our living room window. The window is reflecting the room, but the stained glass you can see on the left of John's shoulder--that is St. Paul's across the street. This shows the color of the room-deep turquoise, matches my favorite curtains. Going for a monochromatic look in here. Maybe. This week, anyway!)

Must take pictures of some quilting tomorrow. Or change the name of this blog:
Lunch Dates
Us Everyday
Side by Side
Johnny's Rib
Early Unexpected Unwanted Retirement
Praying for a Miracle
Waiting for Windows to Open

Falling in Love is Fiction

And I never once kissed my fiance. By choice. By agreement. And in fairness, I have to say it was a short two month engagement...separated by half the country.

(backyard, big yellow leaf tree, in the rain)
I think you choose to love. Being in love is action. Love is decision, commitment, effort, service, edifying, and worthwhile. And yes, spark matters. It's on the list. You can choose to ignore a spark or attraction if it exists with the wrong person for you, or at the wrong time.

We've been watching "Spooks" online. Unrequited love was the episode today (along with the MI-5 spy stuff). Two characters cared about each other, but never cross the line as co-workers. (Have I mentioned I was Johnny's boss when we met?) Good drama. So sad. (Johnny, chick-flick watcher and expert, reminds me that it is the same story as "Remains of the Day")Glad we chose to get married young.

We met 3 years before we got married. Two of those years we wrote letters to each other and were separated by a continent. While we were seriously dating we tried a 3 week experiment: no kissing, to see if our relationship was strong enough and would survive if we took the physical element out. It's hard to go backwards if you are exclusively dating. We still held hands and hugged good-bye and talked, lots.

Three weeks ended and we kissed again, and realized that we needed to stop again. We liked each other too much, and we were both trying to get ready to serve full-time missions.

Flash forward 2 years and 4 months: we kissed again over the alter, as a married couple.

The Best of Yeterday's Photos to Represent Today:

Sister Deb made a comment about wanting to try cropping--YES! It has been fun to learn more and feel free to play with photos. My biggest advice: save a copy of original photo BEFORE you start, and then save as you play, so you can see what happens as you tweak the picture!The original picture was horrible--I had lipstick on my teeth and nose hairs sticking out. This, I could almost use as a profile picture!
And if you saw the pictures on John's blog about his mom--I played with this one some more, loving what happens when you change the angle in a picture.
Tuesday Temple picture before going in.
Original photo I took after we came out.
Picasa lets me straighten or tilt. And crop & change temperature/color/shadows/focus.

My favorite after playing with the image.

Crop it OUT?!

When we were first married we used a film class editing reminder. Verbally we said, "Rewind, start over" in the middle of an argument. "Take TWO." Or three...Communicating is complicated.

There is power in editing. In repenting. In deleting. In starting over. Cropping a photo tells a different story. Less is okay.
Change is okay.

Back door=#3, kitchen curtain fabric from IKEA. Exit sign from yard sale last summer. New orange shirt $2 from favorite thrift store yesterday.

As soon as we get the kids all off to school we are driving down to the temple. It's a good day to remember, and renew. Pray and serve. Repent and remember. Hope and remember. Forgive and forget and remember to count blessings.

1. Good, honest, faithful husband.
2. Temples close enough--1 1/2 hours away.
3. Children-brilliant, mostly healthy (get better Em), strong, faithful.
4. Family support in trials.
5. Trials that help us remember, start over, re-prioritize, spend time together.
6. Working car.
7. Seminary! I love teaching. Showed the class the dress I wore the day I was baptized and given the Gift of the Holy Ghost by the laying on of hands! Had them write down what they remembered on their day. 2 Nephi 31!
8. Colors of Fall! Glorious oranges and reds, rusts, purples, brilliant yellows and golds, crunchy browns. I love this time of year!

Mostly Okay

Happy Birthday DAY to brother Michael!
This is one of 2 antique quilts I own. Found it at The Goodwill for $40, a nice Jacob's Ladder. Told John about it, and he went and bought it for me for Mother's Day. Lots of feedsacks and 1940's prints. Currently hanging in our room.

Deb is right to worry. No couple picture blog means I am having a very bad no good rotten day and might as well move to Australia.

Plans went awry. We didn't go to the exercise club this morning together as we talked about. We have through the end of December paid for, so there is a little pressure to get our money's worth, squeeze in all the use we can before it ends. The swimming pool is getting the dome put up for winter, so it meant I would have to bike or elliptical or row or run. Swimming is my sanity in the morning. It helps me focus, helps me feel better physically. Keeps me from feeling depressed.

Instead, I had a freak out cleaning fit when I walked through the kitchen, every counter covered, crumbs, dirty sticky floor I had asked for help cleaning last week. It was not pretty. And I didn't have any clean clothes, due to the pile of laundry sitting in the living room.

Imagine grumpy discussion. I have a flight reflex. Things aren't good, I just want to run away for awhile, calm down. He always kisses me good-bye anyway, and reminds me of the good things that won't change. Me leaving in the car determined to escape the things I wish I could change.

I drove out to my favorite thrift store, walked the aisles, listening to love songs playing on the radio and felt better after two hours. Called John and told him I was coming home for lunch.

Our lunch dates are fun. Talked, didn't watch any shows on the computer. Told him how worried I am about running out of my meds in a few weeks. Talked about Emma.

I made it to my client appointment only 3 minutes late. Fun girls' room to paint after Thanksgiving. Sometimes I feel like my job is mostly just encouraging the client and patting them on the back, telling them they really do have good ideas and instincts about how to decorate!

Be Thankful

After Church, front porch, Stewart photographer. Banner that didn't sell at the craft show hangs on our porch!

The stake presidency counselor gave a talk that included fast offering encouragement. I wrote a note to John asking what we were doing about that this month. He wrote back the amount we paid in October, and then for November, that amount doubled. Tears pricked my eyes. Who is this man of faith I married? How can he be so good and so hopeful in times of trial?

Somehow, we are going to make it.

I did get another job, cleaning every other Friday. And I have a decorating/mural appointment tomorrow afternoon.

Trying to wrestle up more clients! Who do you know that needs a room painted, a saying on the wall, family tree, castles, skeletons, sports memorabilia, animals, landscape, clouds...?

Our Evening Has Just Begun

Before we left for the gala: Suzu is our photographer tonight.

Living room, in front of teal linen curtains.
Lazy Saturday morning. I read a book in bed while John took the boys to the Church for outside clean-up. Ironed, cleaned some, then at 4 pm I gave a talk at a baptism for the most beautiful blond-haired boy.

In less than an hour we are going to a gala fund-raiser at the library, cocktail dress. I was worried about what to wear months ago. No LBD for me. I own a BIG black dress, but it is more suited to dancing-super full skirt. Guys are so lucky, wearing suits and looking shiny in their ties. Harder for women to be modest and comfortable and feel attractive and fashionable...with no shoulders bared. It is warmer to be modest, I've noticed. I am wearing a silk skirt I made from two $3 ones from an outlet store, a thrift store cashmere blue sweater, and flowers I made from an old scarf. It was shedding, so I tipped the ends in silver paint (the same paint on "husband & wife" mural and on our living room ceiling).

The gala is over at 11 pm, but I know I will be ready for pumpkin hour much earlier. Max asked what that meant. I explained the Cinderella reference. He looked dubious. I should have read him more fairy tales.

He and Stewart are at a Church dance, which includes a Laurel-Priest activity: etiquette dinner, speed dating, and then the dance! Can't wait to hear what the boys have to say about their evening!

So even if we get home early, we will stay up to see them safely home and hear how it went. Teenagers don't need diapers changed; the parenting is still time consuming, just differently. They need to be listened to, questioned, time spent talking.

Friday on the Front Porch

We live in a brick 1950 rancher. The morning sun comes up over the front porch. Us, sitting in the rocking chair Jessica gave me!

And if I am going to keep calling this a quilting-making blog, here is an old quilt, another strip project. My 8 siblings each made 9 houses on some great cloud fabric and we exchanged them. The theme was "Love at Home" hymn. Gyleen & Didi are among the quilters who made me 36" strips. I rotate the quilts I hang in our home, and it is almost time for this one to come out for show. Those candlesticks get re-painted every time I re-paint the living room. They are currently silver...I re-paint often.

He's Mine Forever

...and I'm his!

No, it's not our anniversary or anything. This image in front of our hallway mirror just made me think of the covenants we have made in a temple of God and how we were sealed by authorized priesthood authority, married for this life and beyond death.

Stuck together, bound, intertwined lives and souls. Hopes and futures, and now 20+ years of history!

How could we have known so young that we were making the right decision? A choice that would impact the rest of our existence?

Sobering, how important that decision really is. Not something you want to do on a whim, or without lots of thought and prayer.

I think that is where personal revelation comes in. He prayed before he asked me to marry him, wanting to know if this was a good choice. I prayed to know, too. And we keep working at it. Living happily ever after means lots of talking, listening, forgiving, working, understanding, loving, being together. Thinking unitedly and in terms of us and we, not me, me, me, me, me, ME.

I need this man. He is good for me, uplifts me, helps me when I feel sad, builds my confidence, encourages me, entertains me, makes me laugh, listens when I cry and struggle for words. Holds me, and rubs lotion on my sore shoulders. I love parenting with him, taking care of our home and children. I love being with him socially, seeing how funny he is in crowds (needed him last night for crowd control during the seminary activity. HE could have gotten the guys off the stage and involved in the activity...) I couldn't do all this without him.

And I think I'm good for him, too. Check out his smile!

History in the Making

Grandma Sandy did win the election!
Roxie and Sam came downtown after school, ran around in Grandma Sandy sweatshirts (moving advertising billboards) and played on the playground.

Us this morning, in front of garage. I like the reflection off of his glasses.

And some historical photos I found yesterday, that may be repeats...

Anniversary trip, can't remember which bed & breakfast treat trip, but it was by a romantic pond. We got our 2nd standing ovation for kissing when the breakfast inn workers saw us and cheered. (The first was pre-mission, saying good-bye after coming out to meet his family for the first time. We thought we were alone, and there were flowers and a Gilligan Island scene re-enactment in front of this huge glass window where a business meeting was taking place. Moral of the reminiscing: if you get standing applause for a kiss, you must be doing something right!)

Virginia Beach, safely and happily married!