This is a Good Place

Thanks to a friend at John's work, we stayed in a sweet little condo in Dewey.  Deserted off-season beach, beautiful full moon over the calm water, sunrise from a warm upstairs room looking out at the ocean.  Very relaxing and nice to get a weekend date, just us.  Cream of crab soup, crabs, lots of cheese.  Crayon drawing on the table waiting for crabs.  And 3 different thrift store shopping for sister missionary clothes for Suzanna!  (Wearing my altered tiger-t-shirt cut in half and sewn onto a sweat shirt front=easy project.)

Another place to add to the Max's ashes memorial.  Good place to remember him, honor him, tell him how we are feeling, how much we miss him.

Ironbirds Baseball Date

Mrs. Famini taught Emmalyn, Maxwell, and Suzanna, elementary school.  She hosts the section behind home plate, the table seats!  A sweet friend gave us tickets to see the game.  And this time we WON!  5 home runs in first inning!  Very exciting game, and I get very emotionally involved, cheering, trying to pay attention to the difference between a strike and a ball, getting to know players.

Guess who was holding camera???

Date for Pains

 You are invited!

Artist David Babcock and his artist wife, Julie, will be staying with us Monday, Memorial Day night.  If you want to come meet him, shake his hand, congratulate him on making WORLD RECORD for longest scarf knit while running a marathon...come on over!  Cookies and s'mores, our backyard anytime afte 5 pm!

Pre-existing complications aside, and after months and months of physical therapy, and trying really, really hard to NOT bend over and pick anything up (I am allowed to squat to get to floor, that is it) I went to the doctor under duress.  John scheduled a double appointment for us, or I would not have gone.  I dislike strongly the feelings of helplessness, mortal bodies falling apart...  He gets to have knock-out-shoulder cracking surgery since he can't lift his right arm and his shot last month didn't help.  And I got a shot today which should help.  Bursitis.  Left hip.  Which explains the pain that I thought was my back.  Making my bulging lowest disc back pain suddenly the most noticeable thing again.  Numbness in my left leg could be bursitis or back-related nerve.  Which may need another shot, this time in spine, or surgery if that doesn't help get inflammation down.  Lovely.  Actually, I am thankful, for bodies and the reality of mortality.  Even though it hurts.

Testimony of Fiddler on the Roof...

Families matter.  Letting go of our children as they leave home and create their own family units is emotionally tough.  We lose control as they make independent choices.  We hurt and rejoice as we watch them survive their life experiences.  We pray harder, pleading for help.  Tevye is right up there high on the list of characters I admire for his honest prayers.

Friday night my visiting teacher gave us two tickets for a high school production of "Fiddler on the Roof."  Three youth from our ward were in the cast.  One of the amazing things they did was stage it with REAL children--so the high school students were the adults, and then having younger children also singing and in the group scenes--making it visually powerful that we were talking about families...Loved it.  I bawled during "Sunrise, Sunset" and "Do you love me?"  After 25 years...that is us, this next spring.  What a great story of prayer and family and even the absurdity of not talking to a child who disobeys you...We laughed and clapped and were very impressed with the talent that brought this story to life.

Saturday we met family on the windy-chilly day to witness the sealing of our two new nieces from Ethiopia to my brother and his wife! (I should have worn boots and a heavier coat!  Brrrr!)

 

It was windy and cold!  Fun to see outfits from Emma+Dean's wedding reception that still fit!  Evelyn's dress was one of my favorite thrifted finds!

Mezgeb and Rosie are officially a part of our extended forever family.

This was my favorite picture of Lu+Bob.  Temples make happy couples...

Sam took this one from the warmth inside the visitor's center.  LIGHTS are up next week for Christmas!  Nieces play flute recital December 7th.  We are also hoping to go down December 26th evening for a family history work session/sealing with our Provo children in town.

Red, White, & Blue SUPER Dress!

It started with me looking on-line for "cowl neck dress patterns free" and I found the "Eva" dress which I thought looked easy to sew, beautiful lines...Then I signed up for the "Your Style Rocks" site to get access to the pattern, and looked at The Opulent Poppy blog to see the Eva who designed the dress--she made a super modest one out of vintage yellow cotton.  (Hurrah for MODEST WOMEN!)

Printed out all 54 or so pages of the pattern in my size.  Carefully taped them together, cut them out, and started looking for stretchy fabric in my fabric storage.  Nothing in yardage, and being thrifty makes you more creative/desperate...

I had recently gone through all the boy's t-shirts with Stewart as we looked for post-mission clothes for him.  Superman was in a Sam-doesn't-want pile and too big for Stewart (he likes to wear correct size, slim & trim and not baggy) and the Nebraska map fabric was a too-small-but-Roxie-didn't-want pile.  Instead of using top of pattern I used a tissue-weight t-shirt that was way too low on it's own. 

When Suzanna saw the skirt portion she was immediately complimentary and interested so I made it to fit her.  She wore it to Church Sunday with a red belt that cinched in the middle more on her hourglass figure and she got many, many compliments.  The Young Women's president couldn't believe I made it and wanted the YW to learn, use their old YW camp t-shirts.  Actually her parting quote was "You should PIN it!"

The front portion of skirt is one t-shirt--one without side seams so I cut the pattern as it fit under the left arm-pit and wrapped around the right side onto the back of the t-shirt.

Mixing & matching other cast-off t-shirts and stretchy fabric tops I made 2 other dresses, a turquoise & bright neon yellow one I love and a modern polka-dotted yellow & gray & black & white.  They went together quickly because I was using a t-shirt or stretchy top that is finished and using the t-shirt hems for the hem of the dress.  It is a color-blocked look, very comfortable, totally me. 

So where is the picture?  I need to be a little braver to wear it, because it is so wild, new, artsy.  I say it is totally me and then I get nervous, embarassed a little, not wanting the attention I know I will get.  I need some confidence-boosting cheerleaders.  John loves it, it is modest, maybe a little sexy because I look like a woman in it, with girl parts, instead of hiding.

I altered this top after Cardigan Empire's suggestion that cowl necks are perfect for my Delicious Apple Middle body shape, and felt pretty on our date to Star Trek movies (Saturday matinee with all the kids in tow, so it was more a family outing than a date-date).

(Dirty mirror needs to be cleaned.)  Did not want to wear a tank top or another t-shirt underneath so sewed in another fuschia modesty bib layer (another t-shirt) just under the cowl to bring the neckline up higher.

Save those t-shirts, even with holes!  The Superman dress has two hearts appliqued on random cities to patch over two tiny holes.  If you don't think you will make anything with those t-shirts, donate them to me, and I will hand-craft one for you (or me!).

Date Success Story

We went because we heard it was good. Who told us about this place? We will listen to your advice more often! Over the river and through the toll plaza is Johnny's Sushi House.

Fantastic service, beautifully and artfully arranged plates, perfect miso soup, great sushi rolls, nice wasabi consistency. We are going back!

Suzanna's school friends overheard her talking about her parents going out on a date. "Together? With each other?" They were amazed.

Yea, we are that kind of couple. Still dating after all these years. Plenty to talk about, still having fun. We go to bed earlier (getting old and tired) but there is nobody I would rather spend time with than my Johnny.

Food, Glorious, Yummy Food!

It had been since 2004. It was time.

If you have never had a colonoscopy, it can sound like a horror show. Spare you the details?

Let's just say, this time, it was near perfect. Thanks to some good tips from the Colon Club. Three days before, I started soft foods only. Lovely, lovely homemade applesauce. Rootbeer float. That kind of thing. Liquids on day two: miso soup, chix soup, gaterade, a whole 2 liter of cream soda for the calories. And the over-the-counter prep went like a breeze/sneeze. Investing in baby diaper rash ointment helped, too.

I love my good Jewish doctor! I told him this morning in Bible Study class we had talked about Abraham & Isaac. I asked my 13 year old son to lie down on the center of the two tables pushed together. He had his pillow & blanket, kept his eyes closed, dozed. Great attention grabber for the story of a father's love for his son and willing sacrifice (Isaac could have run away, over-powered his old dad. It could have been a much different story.)

So during this routine GI procedure we are chatting about the great prophets. I was comfortable enough that he only used minimal meds, so I was out of recovery quickly, for a nice, lovely lunch-date with John for....(I warned him, what I really, really wanted after 3 days of no food) good guacamole! Heavenly, wonderful tastes!

Lab results in two weeks, but no suprises. Moderate disease, in "remission" symptom-wise, but I still have Crohn's. The ulcers and inflammation show up as white spots. I have pictures, in time for Halloween haunting.

I wish you all healthy guts, and some glorious tasting. Appreciate your bowels and taste buds.

Dates at Home

We borrow movies from the public library, tilt up Emma's hospital-ish-adjustable bed, and snuggle in for a date. Last night's was John's pick, after careful Rotten Tomato consideration. "The Book of Eli."

A reminder that we met in a science fiction club.

Post-big Flash war film. If you loved Mad Max movies from the 80's, this is much, much better. Wonderful use of color. Fight scenes ballet-ish beautiful and purposeful, not gory or gratuitous. Thematically powerful. Language and violence rating-but on a violence scale, I am still impressed that it was more important to tell the story and continue, no dwelling on acts of war. Very discreet. We turn the sound way down, put on sub-titles that we can mentally edit out-the way I will read a book. Eli reminds me of another film-hero from a set of foreign films I love! His name starts with a Z. Maybe you have to love the genre? Or have been a sword-fencer in college, like me? Not for everyone. Our Max recommends the soundtrack. I loved the clouds. And the promise of a sequel. If you know what I mean?

Friday Again

Tonight is not date night--at least not with the two of us. Mother and son activity for Church. The invitation said come dressed like you are going on a safari. An adventure Sam is eager for! Work can wait. Date can take place tomorrow morning instead. Tonight, I am a mom of a handsome-almost-12-year old son!

Three Choices...

Today's seminary lesson was on the difference between secrets and surprises--specifically the evil and harm of secret combinations made for evil purposes and to control others, and then the good kind of Happy Birthday surprises. Bad ones are secret addictions. Things you feel guilty about and don't want your mom or bishop to find out--those are really bad.

(End of seminary application. Further is how it applies to me.)

I've been thinking about some of my friends and their serial monogamy. The desire to be committed to one person is a good desire. Wanting a committed, righteous marriage--good goal. The reality is hard work. And sometimes things happen out of your control--the choices the other person makes that don't include you.

It is sobering to hear about how those "secret" bad things tear apart marriages. Weaknesses that are hidden, lies, bad choices. Not sharing whole self with spouse and keeping back parts for some one else, a new girlfriend/boyfriend; innocent-seeming beginnings that turn more and more intimate and exclusive and pushes the spouse out. Dangerous. Slimy. Horrible. How can they not see what they are doing, the pain they are causing?

And what advice do you give, or do you just listen to someone going through that?

What do you say to the offended spouse? (And I always remind myself I am hearing one side of the story...).

I've been married to the same guy for 21 years. I'm no expert.

Simple answers:

Stay married for the sake of the kids. Try counseling. Get ecclesiastical help. And if it continues? Keep forgiving. How many times? Separate for the sake of your sanity. Or....?

I don't ever want an ex, or the grief and heartache that comes from making visitation for kids smooth and fair. A friend came over last week in tears about the attorney costs to keep her kids all summer. I was sympathetic. Tried to help my grieving friend. Build her up. Tell her how wonderful she is and encourage non-conflict with her ex for the sake of the kids.

Hard stuff.

So tonight during dinner John innocently asked me if I recycled our lunch pizza box.

"PIZZA?!" the kids exclaimed.

And John said, "Aren't you lucky to know your parents are in love and go on dates in the middle of the day without you?!"

No answer. (Wish I knew what they were thinking sometimes!)

They kept eating the French toast and guacamole dinner I had whipped up for them.

Two loaves of bread and half another, 10 eggs+sour cream+vanilla flavoring (the buttermilk had gone bad--that's how long it's been since I've cooked dinner. It takes a really, really long time for buttermilk to go bad and I use it all the time when I am in cooking-mode! Great blessing of John losing job has been him teaching kids how to cook-but I guess I use more buttermilk than he does...).

Guacamole was on the side (veggie!). With chips. So a carb-heavy dinner, but it was so good.

Choice #1 original photo
Choice #2 color-leeched
Choice #3 cropped, tilted, and sepia-ed; (my favorite. Which is yours?)

Take Two (and Three...) Date Game

We moved down the block a little bit from yesterday's posted photos, so the triangle "Gothic" shape would be in the background straight on. We had an intense discussion where the pokey tool should go (we don't have a pitchfork anywhere in the garage?), and where our shoulders should touch and who should hold the pokey tool. Do you know how hard it is to look serious, when we are so used to smiling for photos?Sometimes you just have to have a sense of humor when things go awry.


Oops, John is supposed to be looking upward. I remembered "look like you are praying" but forgot the guy is looking heavenward.

And the dancing will go on.