I thought I would probably be a good mom, because I liked babies, liked doing creative things with kids. From being the oldest of 9 children I had lots of experience with managing groups, the feeding and cleaning necessary. I was confident. Too cocky, surely.
I really liked the Guy-Future-Father-of-My-Children--couldn't think of living without him or him with anyone else but me!
I didn't anticipate having to do things when I am tired and hungry and stressed, all at once. Function under fire, with a smile. Boot camp for motherhood would include sleep-deprivation and multi-tasking while being interrogated and assaulted with horrible smells and sensations. And de-sensitizing of irritants. Pick the top ten things that bug you and figure out how to ignore/put-off/dismiss them.
stealthily sticky kitchen counters (you don't notice until you put a paper down on them to sign and than you can't pull it up without ripping the paper)
food on the floor and candy wrappers (evidence!) in a non-eating room
dirty socks on top of couch pillows awry
spit on the bathroom mirror & muddy shoes on just cleaned carpet
toe nail clippings in disturbing places (kitchen counter!) or hairs in the butter
loud noises when trying to sleep
encroaching on your territorial borders & collapsing of any personal space bubble
non-stop questioning and endlessly repeated instructions that are ignored
over-flowing garbage cans that smell really bad
multiple needs from multiple people with multiple expectations...
I wish I had taken more naps earlier in life to make up for sleep-less life now. I'm not walking the hallway calming a colicky baby these days, just waking up early to teach them and trying to go to be in bed early enough with teenager's crazy schedules.
Can you read the recipes on the yellow sticky notes? Details matter, add up. Small things can move mountains, or make mountains. Constant, daily efforts determine character. I am my choices. 70 shrinking extra pounds of ice cream and chocolate choices balanced with 1/2 hour of exercise almost every week day. (How many snickers is that?) Today, I choose to exercise early, be productive, study more, be nicer. Too many grouchy-mommy moments yesterday, and I stopped swimming after 20 minutes of laps. I can be better today than I was yesterday, by choice.
12 comments:
Remembering the sleepless seminary struggles and late night teen events and empathizing with you. Big challenge and lifestyle issue for me too. Worth it of course. And I'm still recovering.
I've been thinking a lot about choices that have to be made before knowing all the consequences-- like biking before knowing there'll be cold headwinds. It's hard sometimes. But I keep biking anyway because I mostly love it and it's good for me. But it's still hard sometimes.
Your list of irritants made me laugh, wince, harumph indignantly, and sigh with sympathy. You are a great Mom, friend, wife, roommate, teacher. We are lucky to have you!
Oh man... all true true true:) I remember learning to eat faster than everyone else (while correcting a paper, putting on mascara and breastfeeding a baby...haha!) just so that I would eat that day. And it is 5:30 and I just dropped off my #5 son at early EARLY morning seminary. Can't imagine if I had to be the one teaching it... because right now I'm going back to bed until I have to get my first grader ready for school at eight! Here's wishing you a little sleep-in on the weekend. Because as a parent driving a child to early-morning seminary for the 11th straight year, if there is one thing I appreciate more than an extra hour of sleep, it is the great seminary instructors who inspire my kids before they head into their crazy and sometimes terrible days! Thank you.
Love the photo! I know that feeling exactly. I laughed at all the fine print and I think that if we had read the fine print we would have laughed and either said, "So what?" or "No, not me!" because we were heading into a life we had dreamed about and none of the naysayers could deter us.
Good for you that you are making great choices for health. I didn't realize you were down 70 lbs. How long has it taken? I need to make better choices but am having difficulty with the motivation. :P
This is a great post and it made me smile! I'm Deb with funnyface photography, thanks for your comment and feel free to link what you want, I love links! Your blog is one I think I will make a habit of reading, it's great!
ohhh, no, not down 70 YET, need to be. SLOWLY shrinking, not fast enough, must exercise more, etc!
Victoria has read my blog?!
And thanks to funnyface photographer Deb! Wow! Pays to comment on famous people's blogs!
Makes me more resolved to say something when I love something. We should all give more compliments!
I am glad that you are my Mom!
I guess there is no way to prepare young people or old people for challenges. They happen. You survive or not. And try to enjoy the things that matter.
I like to think that every day is a fresh start for change. Just because I did not succeed with my self improvement goal yesterday or the day before that does not doom me to failure.....cuz tommorrow is a brand new day to try again!
Sooo funny reading your "list". I remember right after we got married I went into the bathroom and called my mom and told her that we moved in a bad apartment because the place was filthy. She asked me when I last cleaned and I was like....ummmmm. It didn't dawn on me that cleaning was MY job now...LOL!!! Sometimes I still forget : )
Great post, Jennilyn.
Thank you for teaching my collicky baby. You're the best and I am grateful. :)
(Oops. That last one was really from "seven smiles"--
The bread baker is B's "handle" from his college, Great Harvest,bread-baking days...)
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